Should Married Couples Split Mortgage Payments? Here’s What Experts Say

March 21, 2025

Should Married Couples Split Mortgage Payments? Here’s What Experts Say

 

With rising costs and an unpredictable housing market, more couples are re-evaluating how they manage finances—especially when it comes to mortgage payments. Some prefer to split expenses down the middle, while others believe in combining everything as a team.

Financial expert Dave Ramsey recently weighed in on this debate, and his stance is crystal clear.

Dave Ramsey: Marriage Means Shared Finances

Ramsey strongly believes that married couples should combine their finances, including mortgage payments.

"You’re married—not roommates," he says.

According to Ramsey, separating money creates division, while combining finances helps couples align their goals and build wealth together. He emphasizes that there’s no “yours” or “mine” in a marriage—only “ours.”

He also points out that comparing salaries can be unhealthy and that legally, a couple’s income is already combined in the eyes of the government.

"I do not have an income; we have an income," he says, referring to his marriage, where his wife has not earned an outside income for over 30 years.

Ramsey believes that financial unity strengthens a marriage, saying:

"Marriage is always growing together, or it’s growing apart."

Not Everyone Agrees

While Ramsey promotes a one-size-fits-all approach, not all financial experts agree.

Financial adviser Robin Aebischer argues that every couple is different, and how they handle money should reflect their values, communication styles, and long-term goals.

"Some couples thrive with complete financial transparency and shared accounts, while others prefer a more independent approach with separate accounts for personal spending," says Aebischer.

What Works for Some Couples

While Ramsey's approach works for many, some couples successfully manage finances while keeping certain expenses separate.

For example, one X user, Kellina Ferelith, shared her own system:

"My husband and I have separate bank accounts, but we sit down every payday and discuss who will pay which bill. It might sound odd, but it works for us."

This highlights an important point—financial management is personal, and what works for one couple may not work for another.

 

What About Unmarried Homeowners?

Marriage isn’t the only factor in mortgage payments. More single women are purchasing homes—accounting for 20% of homebuyers today.

So what happens when a single homeowner gets married?

Financial adviser Melissa Murphy Pavone suggests that single homeowners should consider a few key factors before merging finances with a spouse:

✔ Prenuptial Agreement – A prenup can clarify whether the home remains separate property or becomes joint property over time.
✔ Estate Planning – If a homeowner wants the property to remain in their name, they should have legal documents in place for inheritance and ownership.
✔ Mortgage Responsibility – If a new spouse starts contributing to mortgage payments, does that give them ownership rights? This should be discussed upfront.

Buying a Home: Married vs. Unmarried

Is it better to buy a home before or after marriage? There’s no universal answer—it depends on financial stability, credit scores, and legal considerations.

✔ Buying solo – Offers full control but can make mortgage qualification harder.
✔ Buying as a couple – Makes financing easier with dual incomes but may lead to legal complications in case of divorce.

Mortgage expert Darcie Gore warns that unmarried couples co-owning a home face more risks:

"If one owner falls behind on payments, the others are responsible for covering it. If they can’t, everyone’s credit score takes a hit."

What Happens If a Couple Splits?

Divorce or breakups can complicate homeownership. Married couples typically split the home as marital property, but for unmarried couples, legal protection is limited.

Common outcomes include:
✔ One spouse buying out the other
✔ Selling the home and splitting profits
✔ Temporary co-ownership for children’s stability

For unmarried partners, a cohabitation agreement can clarify ownership percentages, mortgage responsibilities, and buyout terms—helping prevent messy disputes later.

Bottomline

There’s no right or wrong way to handle mortgage payments in a marriage—it all comes down to what works best for each couple.

🔹 Dave Ramsey says combine everything for financial unity.
🔹 Some experts argue that separate accounts can also work.
🔹 Single homeowners should have a plan before merging finances.

If you’re buying a home, married or not, having the right strategy in place is key. If you need guidance on purchasing, selling, or refinancing, let’s chat about your best options!



Reference: Taylor, J. (2025, February 18). Should married couples split mortgage payments? Dave Ramsey weighs in. Realtor.com.

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